*cough* yes please *cough*


i want my wedding vows to be an intense rap battle with my spouse-to-be
[opens pizza box] *snoop dogg voice* greetings loved ones

Guys, PJ’s lockscreen though. :)
STOP READING IF YOU ARE UNDER THE AGE OF 21 OR NOT MARRIED:
i just counted my jellybeans and there are 69 of them (if you don’t get it i will explain, 69 is a SEXUAL number because it is a sexual position and you shouldn’t do it if you are NOT married, i am very sorry jesus for thinking about these things)

“Bigger boys and stolen sweethearts. Oh, you’re better off without her anyway. You said you wasn’t sad to see her go, yeah, but it’s clear you were though.”